Tuesday, 15 May 2012
Storm clouds
The storm brews and builds up and we fear the worst. Sometimes it passes over without us even noticing it has come and gone. Sometimes the storm does hit and it rages all around until we think we can't take any more, but eventually, with time, the storm always passes and the sun shines once more.
Wednesday, 9 May 2012
I love rain
I'm wondering if my last post was a curse on myself. The number of things I am dealing with are piled so high that my head is heavy and I find that my heart is becoming heavier each day. I get the irony of my feelings right now.
The sound of rain falling outside soothes me a little in the absence of the man that should be stroking my hair. I can't wait until he's home again.
On the upside, I have finally found something good in this endless rain. Its sound soothes a depressed heart and its touch cleanses the mind that is heavy with rubbish. For the first time this spring, I want the heavens to open up and pour down on my world.
The sound of rain falling outside soothes me a little in the absence of the man that should be stroking my hair. I can't wait until he's home again.
On the upside, I have finally found something good in this endless rain. Its sound soothes a depressed heart and its touch cleanses the mind that is heavy with rubbish. For the first time this spring, I want the heavens to open up and pour down on my world.
Thursday, 3 May 2012
The importance of maintaining a depressed stance
I saw this pinned to the noticeboard at the counselling service where I work and I was highly amused by it. It also struck me how true it is and how much we cling to old behaviours and are surprised when things don't change. Reminded me of a quote I used to have on my wall:
"If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got."
"If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got."
Tuesday, 1 May 2012
Driving theory test
I passed!!
I was very worried about it - not about the multiple choice section, because that bit was easy enough, though much harder than any of the mock tests I tried - no, it was the hazard perception bit that I was very anxious about.
I started revising/practising yesterday morning and my clever brain was able to retain enough of the theory to pass the multiple choice, although much of it is fairly obvious if you have a grain of common sense. I found the BSM book very helpful in revising for this and, obviously, the Official Highway Code. All very interesting.
I also used some theory test sites, the most helpful being Driving-Test-Success.Com. The most amusing question I found asked what you would say if one of your drunk friends asked if you would race them to the next set of traffic lights. The correct answer was "Nah, racing's for chavs." Highly amusing and clearly not aimed at intelligent (occasional) Guardian reading learner drivers in their mid 30s.
Anyway, my bug bear is with the hazard perception test. I know some people who have failed this repeatedly - all highly intelligent and verging on genius - and I couldn't understand why when so many less intelligent people are able to pass easily.
For those that cleverly took their test years ago and have no idea what this is, it is a series of video clips where you must click when you see a possible hazard and click whenever you see a sign that increases the risk of this possible hazard becoming an actual hazard. For example, click when you see a car coming from a side road. Click again if it looks like it won't stop and again when it pulls out in front of you. The earlier you identify a possible hazard, the higher the score you get.
All this is fine. My issue is that if you identify hazards that the test designers don't think are hazards, it deducts points and assumes you're cheating. I knew, from a whole day of practicing yesterday, that I have a tendency to notice more hazards than they want me to notice. I am not cheating and in my mind I still maintain that they were possible hazards, but I was penalised for clicking them.
This makes me cross. Perhaps I am too nervous about possible risks and need to chill out - a possibility that I will definitely consider - but I still felt that the test itself was a little unfair. If you could only sit with someone and explain why you clicked and what your thought process was, I feel this would be easier. You pay over £30 for the test and there were at least 10 other people in with me. Surely that is enough to warrant an actual person checking those items where someone seems to click a lot or is just below the pass rate. I understand that maybe there are issues with fairness if you did this, but I really don't think that the way it is done is fair on those who are more sensitive. Even the screen was too bright for me and made my eyes hurt, yet I was told off for adjusting it. Anyway, the best hazard perception practice test I found was one the AA site.
I am sighing. I know this is a long post, but I needed to vent. Vent done, I am deeply grateful that I scraped through and passed. There's no way I'd want to do that again!
Good luck to anyone else taking the theory test!
I was very worried about it - not about the multiple choice section, because that bit was easy enough, though much harder than any of the mock tests I tried - no, it was the hazard perception bit that I was very anxious about.
I started revising/practising yesterday morning and my clever brain was able to retain enough of the theory to pass the multiple choice, although much of it is fairly obvious if you have a grain of common sense. I found the BSM book very helpful in revising for this and, obviously, the Official Highway Code. All very interesting.
 |
| Theory questions - obviously, you can't look inside unless you're on the Amazon website |
I also used some theory test sites, the most helpful being Driving-Test-Success.Com. The most amusing question I found asked what you would say if one of your drunk friends asked if you would race them to the next set of traffic lights. The correct answer was "Nah, racing's for chavs." Highly amusing and clearly not aimed at intelligent (occasional) Guardian reading learner drivers in their mid 30s.
Anyway, my bug bear is with the hazard perception test. I know some people who have failed this repeatedly - all highly intelligent and verging on genius - and I couldn't understand why when so many less intelligent people are able to pass easily.
For those that cleverly took their test years ago and have no idea what this is, it is a series of video clips where you must click when you see a possible hazard and click whenever you see a sign that increases the risk of this possible hazard becoming an actual hazard. For example, click when you see a car coming from a side road. Click again if it looks like it won't stop and again when it pulls out in front of you. The earlier you identify a possible hazard, the higher the score you get.
All this is fine. My issue is that if you identify hazards that the test designers don't think are hazards, it deducts points and assumes you're cheating. I knew, from a whole day of practicing yesterday, that I have a tendency to notice more hazards than they want me to notice. I am not cheating and in my mind I still maintain that they were possible hazards, but I was penalised for clicking them.
This makes me cross. Perhaps I am too nervous about possible risks and need to chill out - a possibility that I will definitely consider - but I still felt that the test itself was a little unfair. If you could only sit with someone and explain why you clicked and what your thought process was, I feel this would be easier. You pay over £30 for the test and there were at least 10 other people in with me. Surely that is enough to warrant an actual person checking those items where someone seems to click a lot or is just below the pass rate. I understand that maybe there are issues with fairness if you did this, but I really don't think that the way it is done is fair on those who are more sensitive. Even the screen was too bright for me and made my eyes hurt, yet I was told off for adjusting it. Anyway, the best hazard perception practice test I found was one the AA site.
I am sighing. I know this is a long post, but I needed to vent. Vent done, I am deeply grateful that I scraped through and passed. There's no way I'd want to do that again!
Good luck to anyone else taking the theory test!
Tuesday, 24 April 2012
Zagreb
Came across a film today that shows the beauty of Zagreb. Goes on a bit (for me), but definitely highlights the things that my heart aches for. Zagreb is a truly beautiful place to be.
Seven minutes with music and speed of visuals that may not appeal to the older generation, but you can turn the volume down and try to enjoy the imagery!
Watch it here.
Seven minutes with music and speed of visuals that may not appeal to the older generation, but you can turn the volume down and try to enjoy the imagery!
Watch it here.
Head down
As I typed the title of this, it occurred to me that it might refer to the approach of birth time, but this is not the case and apologies to anyone who might be DYING for a new baby in their lives - I shall not be providing that particular service at this time.
No, on this occasion it refers to study time. I am busy learning all about the theory of driving and it's really very interesting! I am loving it. Most of it is common sense and really rather obvious, thankfully, but other stuff I knew nothing about!
"In wet conditions your car can aquaplane. This means the tyres have lifted off the surface of the road and are skating on the surface of the water. If your steering suddenly becomes very light, while driving on a wet road, this is a sign that your are aquaplaning. To correct it ease off the accelerator and allow the tyres to regain grip." [With thanks to Driving Test Success]
I wonder if Jesus was aquaplaning when He walked on water. Perhaps He was accelerating so fast that He obtained lift off.
Anyway, it made me chuckle rather a lot. I must find a use for the word 'aquaplaning' in everyday language. It's a good one.
I am also studying codependency and addictions, about which I shall post more another day, when my thoughts have been collected and turned into words rather than fluffy bits of wool.
Love to you all and hope you're enjoying this rather fickle April weather more than I am!!
No, on this occasion it refers to study time. I am busy learning all about the theory of driving and it's really very interesting! I am loving it. Most of it is common sense and really rather obvious, thankfully, but other stuff I knew nothing about!
"In wet conditions your car can aquaplane. This means the tyres have lifted off the surface of the road and are skating on the surface of the water. If your steering suddenly becomes very light, while driving on a wet road, this is a sign that your are aquaplaning. To correct it ease off the accelerator and allow the tyres to regain grip." [With thanks to Driving Test Success]
I wonder if Jesus was aquaplaning when He walked on water. Perhaps He was accelerating so fast that He obtained lift off.
Anyway, it made me chuckle rather a lot. I must find a use for the word 'aquaplaning' in everyday language. It's a good one.
I am also studying codependency and addictions, about which I shall post more another day, when my thoughts have been collected and turned into words rather than fluffy bits of wool.
Love to you all and hope you're enjoying this rather fickle April weather more than I am!!
Thursday, 12 April 2012
Ordering time
Twenty four minutes. Not bad. And then one minute to bring my tea with a big smile and a cheeky wink. Very impressive.
Jelly for brains
Sitting in the cafe in Highgate Woods, I just heard a small child tell his mother that our brains are softer than jelly. I have always imagined mine to be more like a walnut and the idea of it bring as soft as jelly disconcerts me. I feel quite vulnerable now and am suddenly aware of how thin my skull really is in the big scheme of things.
I am also wondering how long it will take until the staff notice me and give me some tea. I don't mind being ignored today. It's quite nice actually, but I remain mildly curious and am experiencing an unexpected sort of satisfaction at being able to sit at this lovely table in this lovely cafe without having to order anything. I might even be cheeky in a bit and get my own drink out of my bag...
I am also wondering how long it will take until the staff notice me and give me some tea. I don't mind being ignored today. It's quite nice actually, but I remain mildly curious and am experiencing an unexpected sort of satisfaction at being able to sit at this lovely table in this lovely cafe without having to order anything. I might even be cheeky in a bit and get my own drink out of my bag...
Wednesday, 11 April 2012
Life in the fast lane
Life has overtaken me somewhat and despite seemingly having a lot of free time, I have surprisingly little time to write or to think or to just be.
Everyone who needs to know, knows what's going on in my life; and those that don't know, probably don't need to know. Suffice to say, I feel as if I am juggling more balls than I can handle. I am making lists every day and working my way through each one. This makes me feel pretty good as I know I am achieving small things. I am clearing the site to make space for the big things.
As to the big things, they are all things that I have no control over, so I am forced to wait and be patient. Patience, patience. A difficult thing to have when so many things I want and am waiting for are held in the hands of others.
Everyone who needs to know, knows what's going on in my life; and those that don't know, probably don't need to know. Suffice to say, I feel as if I am juggling more balls than I can handle. I am making lists every day and working my way through each one. This makes me feel pretty good as I know I am achieving small things. I am clearing the site to make space for the big things.
As to the big things, they are all things that I have no control over, so I am forced to wait and be patient. Patience, patience. A difficult thing to have when so many things I want and am waiting for are held in the hands of others.
'erbal tea
I can now report back on the fantastically cheap tea strainer I bought in Norway. It miraculously happens to be the best herbal tea 'bag' I have ever used and I have already received requests for next time I am in Norway. A most excellent purchase.
PS Apologies for the photo - I can't work out how to 'turn' it... :-(
PS Apologies for the photo - I can't work out how to 'turn' it... :-(